Signs of the Apocalypse: Andy Sutton Pulls a Howe, Gary Roberts Hurt

Photographic evidence that Roberts is, in fact, hurt. Jim McIsaac/Getty Images

It's been a while since we have had any updates on the fate of the known universe, but since so many odd things are happening tonight, this is no better time to get you caught up. In fact, so many weird stories are popping up in the hockey world, (you know, the kind of things that should only happen "when pigs fly") tonight just may be the end of the world.

First up is the immortal and worshiped (at least in Pittsburgh) Gary Roberts. If you remember, a while back the Thrashers mistook Mark Recchi for Gary Roberts, obviously because Roberts is so darned cool. Roberts is on such a high pedestal that the phrase "what would Gary Roberts do?" is sweeping through Pittsburgh. But you already knew that. What you didn't know is that the potentially immortal Roberts broke his leg during the Penguins game tonight against the Sabres. If it is true that Gary Roberts can be stopped, then what about the rest of us?

But the best quote on the situation comes from ESPN and is a true testament to what Roberts is all about.

"A stretcher was brought out but Roberts did not use it."

Simple, to the point and Bad. Ass.

Oh and, cause I know we all love things like this, I'll post the video when it becomes available on YouTube. This could potentially be the type of play that you watch in horror, but somehow can't look away. All joking aside, I'm certainly wishing the best to Roberts right now. Gary, get well soon buddy!

In other apocalyptic news, one of the most unlikely players in the NHL had a "Gordie Howe Hat Trick." Think about it for a second. Who could achieve such a feat?

Andy Sutton. Yes, Andy Freaking Sutton. In the Islanders' 5-2 win over the Devils, Sutton had a goal, his first of the season, an assist and a fight to achieve the prestigiously dubbed feat. If Andy Sutton is doing a darned good Gordie Howe impression, then you know the apocalypse must surely be upon us. Yikes.

In more normal news, Alex Ovechkin had four goals and an assist against the Senators. Now that is something that doesn't make my brain hurt.