Tuesday's Hockey News

Tuesday can only mean one thing here about BMR. Yes we're only one day away from humpday, but more importantly it's the day we take a look at the interesting hockey stories that the major media outlets have missed. It's a segment that is not cleverly titled -- my marketing professor would be upset -- but, hopefully, is still entertaining.

ECHL - Suspended Indiana Riverhawks forward Cam Greesen three games for attempting to joust with a Portland Fightin' Ferrets player on Saturday night. The Portland player was cut Sunday night. The pair dropped the gloves, skated to opposite sides of the arena, mounted their netminder, and charged at each other. Neither play was seriously injured. Today, the Portland player was signed by Medieval Times.

Edmonton Oilers - Have signed the baby in the picture to your right to a three-year contract. The value of the deal is estimated at about $4.5 million per year. Kevin Lowe reportedly had the child cloned from Ryan Smyth's DNA. In 2022, this signing could be a steal -- if the kid re-signs.

Toronto Maple Leafs - Have announced plans to take a portable dressing room around town in order to "put fans first." The replica was constructed inside a tour bus and will give fans an inside look at the team if, you know, it was the actual dressing room and wasn't a random bus.

Wait, no, that last one is true.