Welcome to Crease Chat!

***Welcome to the official Chatroom of professional hockey goalies!***



Emery_bored: Man, I hate Russia. Like, I look at these road signs and It’s like Klingon or somethin.

Cowboy_Curtis:well, it is in RUSSIA, maybe they’re in Russian

Emery_bored: doncha have a russian goalie over in TO?

Cowboy_Curtis:there are Russian players, but not a goalie. Toskala is from Finland.

Emery_bored: Finland’s IN Russia, ya dumbass

*** Miler_time has entered the chat room***


Miler_time:’sup fools?

Emery_bored: sup honkey?

Miler_time: yo Curtis, whose bed have YOUR boots been under? Mine been under your MOM’s!

Cowboy_Curtis:Shut up, Miller

Emery_bored: But man, Curtis, you gotta come over here. The women are crazy, like tranny hookers

Miler_time: Tranny hookers like your mom?

Cowboy_Curtis: what is it with you and people’s moms?

Miler_time: I dunno it just started after I did that ad for AMP. I can’t stop drinking the stuff. Guess how many cans of Amp I’ve had today

Cowboy_Curtis:I dunno, 3, 4?

Miler_time: 36

Cowboy_Curtis: in a row?

Emery_bored: Shouldn’t you be in a coma or something after that? What kind of stuff happens so you drink 36 Amps?

***welcome to Miller_time flashback chat***


Ad_hole : So, Mr. Miller, will you be in our commercial?

Miler_time: What is it I’m selling again, ad person?

Ad_hole : Amp, an energy drink. Here’s a sample

Miler_time: Golly gee, this stuff tastes like battery acid. Is it healthy?

Ad_hole :oh, of course…all natural…no harmful side effects at all…and all the profits go to children

Miler_time: really?

Ad_hole : well, we’re all somebody’s children. Now, the concept of the ad is one that is edgy and urban. You and another NHL goalie will participate in a “yo momma fight” and you win after drinking Amp energy drink.

Miler_time: “Yo momma fight”? But if our moms are fighting, why are the other goalie and I there?

Ad_hole :No Ryan, you trade insults about each other’s mothers.

Miler_time: That’s terrible! Why would I insult some stranger’s mother?

Ad_hole : siiiigh…Vinny, do your work

***VinnyTheThug has knocked out Miler_time***


*** Miler_time is now strapped to a chair, eyeballs taped open, IV of Amp in each arm, with multiple screens playing the show “Yo Momma”***



Miler_time: Wha…what happened to me?

Ad_hole : Ryan, this just seemed to be the easiest way to acquaint you with our concept. Miler_time :Why is Fez insulting my mom?

Ad_hole : well Ryan, that’s what a yo momma fight is. And since we need you addicted—I mean, familiar with our product, we have you on some Ivs of straight Amp

Miler_time: I feel…BLARGH I FEEL SO INTENSE I FEEL LIKE A FIGHTER JET MADE OF BICEPS!

the next day...




Emery_bored: Miller? You there Miller?

Miler_time: JUST INJECT IT INTO MY VEINS!

Miler_time: /guzzles Amp

Cowboy_Curtis: I’m only gonna say this once and I want no discussion as to how I know this: between the toes or under the tongue with CLEAN needles.

Miler_time: thanks man, my urine’s so acidic it could probably eat through walls.


***world_of_Raycroft has entered the chatroom***

***Cowboy_Curtis has left the chatroom***

***Emery_bored has left the chat room***

***Miler_time has left the chat room***


world_of_Raycroft: aw shucks, not again.