Monday, June 18, 2007

The NHL Draft Keg Party: Patrick Kane

Here at BMR we try to provide you, the reader, with as educational and entertaining a look at the NHL as possible. In preparation for the NHL Draft, today we continue with a feature entitled 'The NHL Draft Keg Party'. The goal of this feature is to provide you with information about the prospects that you haven't heard already. Hopefully, this will be a fun and entertaining endeavor. (Disclaimer)

No, we didn't paste a picture of Kane over James Van Riemsdyk. Kane loves the Miller Lite girls too. Who doesn't?
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Prospect Profile: Patrick Kane

Birthdate: November 19, 1988

Position: Right Wing

Height/Weight: 5'10" / 160lb

Shoots: Left

Current Team: London (OHL)

ISS Ranking: #1 overall

CSB Ranking: #2 North America

[NHL Connect Profile] [Hockey's Future Profile]

Nickname: Kaner

Jersey Number: He wears 88, for his birth year. Not for Eric Lindros, thank goodness.

Favorite TV Show: Prison Break

Favorite Movie: Wedding Crashers

Favorite Actor: Will Ferrell

Favorite NHL Team: Buffalo Sabres

Most Memorable NHL Moment: Take a deep breath Sabres fans. You know what's coming. Kane's most memorable moment is Brett Hull's foot-in-the-crease spectacular during Game six of the 1999 finals.


BMR Scouting Report

Today, we preview the handsome young man that you see above, who is arm in arm with some beautiful Miller Lite girls. For all you grandmas reading out there, please, don't try and pinch his cute little cheeks. It's the internet.

Speaking of grandparents, Kane is an old man compared to the many of the players in this year's draft. Born in November 1988, he is nearly a year older than many of the other players in this year's draft. Watch out, though. Grandpa Kane can skate with the best of them. The knock on him coming into the season was his age as compared to the other prospects, but an outstanding season in the OHL (62-83-145) silenced those critics.

Many scouts believe that Chicago would be pretty dumb to not take Kane with the first overall selection, and I concur. With all do respect to the prospects that have already been profiled on this blog, Kane possesses the best off the ice assets out of any of them. There's no sign that he has any affection for John Mayer or Jack Johnson (hopefully, he's into Slayer, or some other ridiculous band that literally kicks ass), and he likes Prison Break (no sign of the OC either), Wedding Crashers and Will Ferrell. That's what I'm talking about! A guy who likes Ferrell and is probably tough as nails just from watching Prison Break? Say no more. He's my #1 pick, hands down.

And no, I didn't just copy and paste pictures of Kane over James Van Riemsdyk. It just so happens that they are both down with Snoop Dizzle and the Miller Lite girls. Fuckin' A, boys. Fuckin' A.

8 comments:

  1. Keep Samsonov away from Mr. Kane, Dale Tallon.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Now this is putting the internet to good use.

    I did the same thing with Sabres rookie Drew Stafford. I have much, much more faith in the coaching staff once I saw he dressed up for Halloween as Jesus.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Of course Brett Fucking Prick Hull's goal is his most memorable moment. It was the worst call in the history of the world, ever, of all time, ever.

    ReplyDelete
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