Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Suggested NHL Auction Items

(C) NHL Auctions

Truth be told, sports leagues are really starting to grasp at straws when it comes to finding new revenue streams. Take, for example, the folks over at NHL auctions. Right now, they're selling what could be a fans' dream (albeit an odd one) -- a spot in the Vancouver Canucks' team photo.

Online auctions in general are crazy things. One day you can buy Boston Red Sox manager Terry Francona's used chewing tobacco (it was from the World Series, you see), the next it's a urinal signed by the Chicago Cubs.

Personally, I see off-beat online sports auctions as the next big thing. So, to help our friends over at NHL auctions, here are a few things that they should consider selling... Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Tickets to a Mike Keenan Management seminar

Training session for aspiring GMs, hosted by Mike Milbury

John Ferguson Jr. Humble Pie

Harvey the Hound's tongue

Tickets to a Panthers game (sorry, that was low)

A dream vacation to Philadelphia Flyers team building camp

An autographed Mark Messier jersey, soaked with his own tears

Todd Bertuzzi autographed hatchet


  1. Additional items:

    Session with Marin Brodeur on improving your marriage

    Jaromir Jagr's toothguard (ain't like he needs it)

    A chance to share some fine BC grass with Fin in the back of his van

    Ryan Smyth's exclusive formula of hair pomade (you think he just rols outta bed like that?)

    and, dare I add it?... a ride in Dany Heatly's speedwagon

    that's all...for now

  2. ^Martin Brodeur
    learn to type, idiot

  3. First of all, I would bid all the money in my pocket for Harvey's tongue.

    Additional items:

    25 nights at Chris Simon's lumberjack school.

    Norby Williamson's (of ESPN) 2 day seminar on how to effectively market the NHL.

  4. 20 day retreat to Kitty Hawk NC for flying lessons taught by Jesse Boulerice

    Though, personally, I want to attend a seminar taught by Kevin Lowe on hockey wives.

  5. A trip to Kazakhstan with George Parros. [See: Borat].

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