Thursday, January 10, 2008

Live Blogging a Meaningless Game... Because We Can

1254 Sharks win it 3-1, and that will about do it for the live blog. Thanks to everyone who hung around tonight, intrepid on-site photographer Liz E and of course JR. Hope you enjoyed it! Not 100% sure, but I imagine the next live blog will be the All-Star game later this month. That should be a whole lot of fun. Have a good night and drive safe folks.

1252 Canucks just about surrender by not even trying to get Luongo out of the net.

1251 Just remembered I'm on ice sheet duty at the FanHouse. Its going to be a long night... One minute to go in the game.

1246 That power play really helped the Sharks as they've controlled all the play during it and in the time after. With a little over three to go this game is all but over. Canucks need goals and they need them fast.

1244 And so the game turns right back around the other way as the Sharks get their seventh power play of the game. The Nucks have had two.

1242 Oh man, the Canucks were almost within one. Ryan Kesler scored, a play I completely missed, and then Henrik Sedin came in with a breakaway... No one with in twenty miles of him and he gets stoned by Nabokov. Big play.

1240 The Canucks postgame magazine show thingy is called "Shark Byte". I get it!! It's cause they're the Sharks and byte makes it all sound hip and cool!! And silicon valley is in California. I get it! They're so cool and in touch with area youth!

1235 Here's another photo from industrious on-site reporter Liz E. JR is up on the big screen after his goal, smoking shark head and all. (colors adjusted by me) The hand in the foreground is obviously someone asking JR, "can I ride next?"

1230 Another Sharks power play, another Sharks goal. Milan Michalek puts in one that caromed off the boards and came right back to him on the short side. 3-0 Sharks. And the shark head is smoking again. So much for the Canucks making it a game.

1228 Not really sure why, but the Sedins always remind me of Professor Frink from the Simpsons. If, you know, there were two of him.

1226 Early observations, but it looks like the Canucks FINALLY showed up to play.

1223 Talk about an unbalanced schedule. The Sharks will have 4 game in hand on Detroit, Dallas and Anaheim after this game is over. The Blues and Coyotes will have a game in hand on the Sharks.

1219 OK, then. That's enough of the JR love fest. I hope he didn't impregnate too many readers. Remember folks, wash your hands. Twice to be safe. Third period is about to start and hopefully it will be a good one. Personally, I'm hoping for a couple of fights.

12:16 -- Losers.

12:14 -- Speaking of goals... Can't wait till the Leafs come to town Saturday. Hopefully they start that swiss cheese raycroft. I'll score like 10 friggin goals. With my eyes closed. And a brew in one hand. It's gonna be sick bro. Peace. I got a game to play. Gotta go live the life.

12:11 -- Ah. You're my fans. I can't hate on you. In fact I love you. But not in that homo way. Not like Pensblog Charlie. Back to why I'm here. Thought it would be good to grace you with my presence cause I havent done that in months. Ugh, you're just like my wife. So needy. Jeez... I'm soooo sorry. What can I say? It's tough being me. It's only once in a while that I get to check in or score goals. You saw that shit? Fucking awesome. So easy. Against the best goalie in the league too. THATS HOW I ROLL. DAMN FRIGGIN FLY.

12:08 -- Whats up nerds? With your fucking live blogs and shit. That's pathetic. Seriously. That's all you have to do? It's Thursday night. Do yourselves a favor. Go out and get some poon.

1205 And here's JR. I'll turn it over to him for a few minutes.

1203 Anyone else think those land rover commercials with all the breathing are creepy? Is it just me?

1200 Happy new day! And the Sharks are on the power play again... Luckily for Vancouver, they now have double digit shots. Congrats.

1154 - 5 minutes to go in the second... and... let's see. I'm getting word that JR is going to give us a report at intermission. Certainly a surprise, I was starting to think he had forgotten we existed.

1152 They're showing the replay where Michalek missed a wide open net, stopped only by Luongo's stick. This guy is absolutely the only thing keeping Vancouver in the game right now. Penalty killed, but the shots are 17-6 San Jose.

1150 Jeff Cowan with a high stick to Milan Michalek... Sharks go on the power play. And through the first minute of it the Sharks PP is absolutely buzzing.

1145 Quick snap back to reality here. With the Sharks up 2-0, a third goal would effectively end this game. The Canucks don't have too much of an offense, not to mention a three goal lead is almost always a killer.

1142 Whew. I'm back. Sorry about that, I just did a whole lap around the block with my shirt over my head because I was that pumped up about the goal. JR BABY. And if you're my neighbor, please, please don't call the cops.

1137 HOLY JEEBUS!! JR nets a rebound on the powerplay!! 2-0 Sharks! Announcer calls it a "rare goal". Oh yeah? Well screw you announcer guy!

1135 JR with a great chance from the slot... Oh man I thought he would really score. That would have been too perfect.


1129 Just realized there were 10 total shots in the period. Pathetic.

1127 Here is a list of things that would make for great entertainment during the next intermission.

  • JR giving a lecture on how he uses his man-aura to score mad babes (complete with on-site example at local bar).
  • Luongo taking shots -- with golfballs.
  • Luongo taking tequila shots, and then playing out the game. Or giving us a running commentary from the bench.

1122 Dave from Santa Clara asks the announcers what players are still using wooden sticks. Is that just a dumb question or do you have a wood fetish?

1120 As promised, they're interviewing Willie O'Ree. That was 247% less awkward than when they interviewed him in Anaheim.... Oh, and I bet Pamela will be with that shark head by week's end. Calling it right now.

1113 The announcers say "JR tries to set up Rissmiller behind the net" and "they'll get a boost in the dressing room". Priceless. Absolutely priceless. Have at it folks!

1112 Just got an email from Liz E who is at the game tonight... Almost on cue, it features a great picture of the frightening Shark head hanging from the ceiling! Liz if you can read this, get a shot of Thornton's beard and one of JR's puck bunnies. Please!

1109 Hell of a job by the #2 pk in the league (that's the Sharks). Had a breakaway and possession of the puck for a good portion of the kill.

1106 Wow, they're interviewing Rivet on the bench. Talk about coverage. The game is almost as heavily covered as JR when he takes a night out on the town. Hioooo! Sorry, I'll stop.

1103 GOAL. Craig Rivet takes a pass from Mike Grier and puts it through Luongo's five hole. 1-0 Sharks. Cut to a shot of a giant shark head hung from the rafters blowing smoke out it's nose. I get it, but that's pretty weird.

1101 Another plug of Willie O'Ree. I almost think they paid him to be there. It's gotta be nice to be Willie.

1055 Sharks are playing very physical hockey. I have no intelligent analysis of that. All I can say is that I'm sure JR is a fan of physical play.

1052 Aaaand they are going to have Willie O'Ree on at the first intermission. All I can think of is the classic YouTube with him, the Ducks announcer and Snoop Dogg.

1049 The puck goes over by the Canucks bench and everyone jumps up on the boards to avoid the too many men penalty. Reminds me of the kids' game, "the floor is lava."

1046 Turns out it was Henrik. Who knew?... Alex Edler of the Canucks gets rocked. He's bending over at the bench in pain. Something to keep an eye on. I didn't realize, but the kid is +18 on the season. Wow.

1044 Tonight's matchup features the white version of the new Sharks unis against those unholy blue Canuck jerseys. Yeesh... And with that one of the Sedins gets called for a penalty for putting his stick on an opponent's hands. This is a touch penalty, but at least it's being called consistently. Oh and I don't know which Sedin. But it really doesn't matter unless we're talking about the All-Star game.

1041 Well, there you have it. This picture (from the Sharks website) doesn't really do it justice. It's much scarier during an on-ice interview.... And with that the puck drops.

1039 During this commercial break I'm working on finding a picture of Thornton's beard. It's pretty scary.

1036 The announcer proclaims "Game 1 of the second half of the NHL season!" I get chills. Not.

1034 And were off and running. First thing I see is a closeup of Joe Thornton's beard. Oh good.

1032 Just ate too much pizza... ugh. Give me a sec to get that video feed going.


  1. 1/2 way through the 1st in a Sharks game and no mention of JR? This is BMR still right?

  2. wow... just as I posted it. But yeah, it doesn't feel right.

  3. I'm sure JR is a fan of physical play. Sure...if by "physical play" you mean "filling puckbunnies with his seed."

  4. @ domi: that's about what I was going for. I just couldnt put it into words so nicely.

  5. giant shark head hung from the rafters blowing smoke out it's nose

    Not as weird as an orca who looks like he has Down's Syndrome blowing smoke from his blowhole. But maybe that's just me talking

  6. haha that is ridiculous. I've never actually seen fin in action... do they really get it to do that?

  7. I will be honest, I didn't read this post, simple because after the Rangers Flyers game tonight, I can't deal with other teams. However, I have to say than any post that can include both Professor Frink and Snoop Dogg has to be considered a smashing success.

  8. "I've never actually seen fin in action... do they really get it to do that? [shoot smoke]" I've seen still photos of him and he can shoot smoke.'s more of an ooze than a shooting of smoke. It's more like the actor inside has a vent for when he's having a cigar.

    @scotty: a frink-snoop collaboration would be historically awesome

  9. Glad you enjoyed using the pictures. Unfortunately, they don't generally allow my kind down from the cheap seats and the iPhone doesn't zoom so every picture was basically the same shot. Next time I go, I promise to try to contribute an up close JR picture. And one of Thornton's beard.

    ~Liz E.

  10. @mina: thanks for the help. good to see you made it out alive, air sharks and all.

    @domi: that sounds hilarious... any pictures?

  11. fin smoking: you found it--it's in that picture of him eating the girl

  12. I know it's a bit late and all (the game was on Thursday), but has anyone ever searched Sedin on Google? I searched a few minutes (I wanted to see what they looked like), and this was what it said for the Wikipedia article:

    Henrik Sedin - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    His identical twin sister Daniel Sedin also plays for the Canucks. Fans commonly refer to Henrik and Daniel as the Canucks bitches. ...

    I don't know, just thought it was relevant (since, ya' know, I remember seeing them being referred to as the Ballerina Twins on here).