Saturday, March 22, 2008

Mulleted Tournament of Champions: Semi-final Round

First off, thanks to everyone who submitted poll ideas on Monday. They were all pretty solid and I may be using some of them in the future. Today, we're going to start a poll thought up by Scotty -- who rocks the best mullet?

This will be a two part battle to the death. Six contestants will enter. The bottom four vote getters will go home and hopefully cut off their mullets. The top two vote getters will come back next week to engage in an epic battle of greased up mulleted goodness for the title of Mulleted King of the Universe.

Hey, it's Saturday. What do you expect?

Before you vote by using the handy dandy widget on your left, here's a breakdown of the contestants that will be vying for your love and admiration. Choose wisely!

Barry Melrose

PROS

  • Sports the longest living mullet on the east coast.
  • It's Barry Melrose. Nuff said.
  • Has been one of the few ESPN employees to not be named in a sexual harassment scandal.
CONS
  • Does, in fact, work at ESPN.

Joe Dirt

PROS

  • Had a movie made about him.
CONS
  • Was portrayed by David Spade in said movie.

Tag Team: Early 90's Jaromir Jagr and Randy Johnson

PROS

  • Two of the best athletes in their sport during their prime.
  • The two most recognizable mullets in sports.
  • Won three two championships (both Jagr) and are still playing today.
CONS
  • Looked like complete jokes.

Brian Engblom

PROS

  • Has a job in TV. I guess that counts.
  • That's about it.

CONS

  • His mullet will always play second fiddle to Barry Melrose's.
  • Does not supply Yahoo Image Search with large, user friendly images.

MacGyver

PROS

  • Adored by housewives everywhere.
  • Played by Richard Dean Anderson.
  • Can make anything out of a swiss army knife.
  • Has made guest appearances on the Simpsons.
CONS
  • Unrecognizable to anyone under the age of 30.

Billy Ray Cyrus

  • If you vote for him, you need to seriously re-examine your life.

Remember, every vote matters! And this time it actually does cause there's not, you know, millions of people voting. Polls close Wednesday at midnight.



5 comments:

  1. Can we write in a vote for Captain Planet? Consider this my official endorsement.

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  2. yeah, Mr. PLank, let's do a write in campaign...except I'm pretty sure Jaromir had to to cook is breakfast while Barry Melrose's feeds off the souls of ESPN viewers. I'm just afraid that if I don't vote for Jagr the mullet will haunt me in my sleep

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  3. Randy Johnson won a world series in 2001 with Arizona.

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  4. Randy Johnson won a world series in 2001 with Arizona.

    But the candidate is "Early 90's Jaromir Jagr and Randy Johnson". I had the same reaction at first.

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  5. Three would be right... I missed Johnson's title with Zona.

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